Alex's Answer

Hi, you are very welcome to Ask Alex.

 

Thank you for sharing what is going on for you. That was not an easy thing to do, but it was the right thing because you should not be hurt by anybody in your life, especially those who look after you.

 

You have said that you live with your Daddy and he says he loves you, but that he hurts you between your legs and touches your private parts, and you don’t like it. You have also mentioned that he has said you will get in trouble if he tells the policeman. You want it to stop.

 

The first thing you need to know is that you have done nothing wrong, so you are not going to get into any trouble. We are so sorry to hear that this is happening to you. This is not right, and it is not allowed for anyone to touch you in your private parts. You have made a brave decision to look for help in stopping this.

 

Sometimes people in our lives can do things that are wrong, and to cover those things up, they can tell us that we will be the ones in trouble if we tell anyone else. This is not true. These types of people are trying to scare you and stop you from getting help and stopping them from doing the bad thing. You have the right to feel safe and not to be harmed in your home and anywhere else.

 

It is really important now that you are supported. Do you have a trusted adult in your life other than your Daddy? This could be an aunt, uncle, granny/nanny, neighbour, teacher, family friend—someone you feel comfortable with and who will listen to what you have to say. This person would support you in making sure you are safe and that this touching does not continue.

 

It is important to know that what your Daddy is doing to you is illegal. He or nobody else is allowed to do this to you or any other children according to the law in Ireland. So, getting support is very important for you. You can reach out like you did with our service by going online and speaking to Túsla. They have a website just for children and young people where they will take your details and contact you at a time that works for you. The website is www.changingfutures.ie. Here, you will be able to get support from adults who will be able to directly help you.

 

It can be so hard, especially when the person doing the bad things is someone who is supposed to be looking after you and is probably the biggest role model in your life to this point. But what they are doing is very bad, and it cannot continue. If you want to talk through this a little more, you can always reach out to our Childline team. You can use the freephone number to ring anytime, day or night, 24 hours a day, on 1800 66 66 66, or by going onto our website at www.childline.ie. You can access our webchat service by clicking on our purple messenger circle.

 

You are not alone in this; you have many supports that can be put in place. But the first step is telling someone in your life who will help and support you with this. We really hope that you get the support you deserve and that you stop being hurt. Keep reaching out.

 

Look after yourself,

Alex