Alex's Answer
I'm 16 and pregnant and feel hopeless
Your Question
My parents yelled at me when they found out I am pregnant. I am 16 and I feel hopeless. I don’t want this baby. My boyfriend hates and my parents are mad at me. Everything is really bad. I feel so alone!
Answer
Hi there and welcome to Ask Alex,
Thank you for reaching out to us, we can only imagine how hard this must have been to do.
You are telling us your parents found out you are pregnant and yelled at you. You are 16 and you feel hopeless. You don’t want to be pregnant. You are also telling us your boyfriend hates you and your parents are angry at you. You feel everything is really bad and you are feeling very much alone.
We are sorry you are experiencing this and that you are feeling so alone. It must be very hard feeling you cannot talk with the people you love about your worries. We are wondering if mum and dad have started looking for supports around you. Have you been able to sit down at all and look for solutions? We hope they come around, but if they don’t, would you have another adult whom you trust to tell them about everything that is going on? They could be another family member, a teacher, a neighbour, or a coach.
It would be pretty common that people would get scared at this kind of news, and that they would react in ways that are not helpful at times. That doesn’t make it right to yell or to treat you like they hate you. An unplanned pregnancy can happen in different ways, but it is never a single person’s responsibility, and by no means whoever gets pregnant is “at fault” of anything. You have the right to feel supported and understood, to be treated with respect and to get the help you need.
We have made a search for you, and the HSE has a service for unplanned pregnancies in which they support young people in different ways. Please, click on this link: https://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/health/health-services/reproductive_health/unplanned-pregnancy/ You will find out they have free counselling services, supports to continue or end the pregnancy and different contact options, from phone calls to chats and texts. They suggest it is normally helpful to have an adult involved, but at the age of 16, you can choose whether you want an adult around or not.
We know all this is very hard to process and to experience, but we hope you find this information useful. We believe they could help you very much and that they could give you the support you are looking for.
If you still feel like you would need someone to talk to, please, remember Childline is here for you. Childline can be reached 24/7, 365 days a year, and they will listen and support you no matter what. Our free phone service is 1800 666 666. You could also chat with us through our webchat service, by clicking on the purple Messenger circle at www.childline.ie.
Please, do not hesitate to contact us again if you need further support. We will be happy to help you.
Wishing you all the best,
Alex